40 Years

This past century has marked the most revolutionary paradigm shift in astronomy since the 1600s. The Universe expands. Light curves. Man on the Moon. Pulsars. Radio Sources. Voids. Galaxy Formation. Dark Matter. Black Holes. Pluto saw it's rise and fall in one century (it was classified as a planet in the 1920's, then demoted ["plutoed"] in 2005). The Hubble constant, light years, galaxy neighborhoods, variable stars, dwarf stars, exoplanets, and many, many more. I could keep going but I shall refrain.

This is a golden age for astronomy, and it ain't over yet! There's still a lot coming. And trust me, it's going to get even better.

I remember when Spirit and Opportunity landed on Mars. I was 14. I watched online (very closely!) for every bit of news. Where they landed, what they were doing. I remember downloading the first image of the Martian landscape. I got choked up and teary. I'm not kidding! I remember thinking, "I'm crying over some red dirt! This is SO COOL!"

O how loud
It calls devotion! genuine growth of night!
Devotion! daughter of Astronomy!
An undevout Astronomer is mad.

— Edward Young, 'Night Thoughts.'

Astronomers, like burglars and jazz musicians, operate best at night.

— Miles Kington, 'Welcome to Kington.'

From our home on Earth, we look out into the distances and strive to imagine the sort of world into which we were born. With increasing distance our knowledge fades until at the last dim horizon we search among ghostly errors for landmarks scarcely more substantial. The search will continue. The urge is older than history. It is not satisfied and it will not be suppressed.

— Edwin P. Hubble, 'Realm of the Nebulae,' 1936

To pass the time!

While I'm waiting for Nana to come home so that we may continue playing, I decided to do this thing I found on Michelle's blog. Please indulge me!

30 Pictures

#1) A Picture of you in your Room

Does it count that the front room used to be my room? :)

{Voldemort}

#2) A picture of you with someone you don't like

I guess I don't pictures of with people I don't like....

#3) A Picture of you very drunk

HahahaHaHAA. One of the 3100 dance parties. Don't worry, it's just sparkling cider. Still, it's very incriminating....

#4) A picture of you in a formal wear

Before a movie premier. I was wearing pearls! (I LOVE pearls...)

#5) A picture of you with make-up

In the act of putting it on!! Yes, I always make a pained face when make-up comes near.

#6) A picture of you when you didn't know it was being taken

Obviously...

#7) A picture of one of the best days/nights of your life

Last night as an RA. I lost count of how many rules we broke. :) Oh, my master key...

#8) A picture that describes how you'd like to spend each day

This day was divine and it ended with me and Jenna on a Ferris Wheel. The day was full of random, fun, crazy adventures, and I was still productive in school/work. That's how I'd spend every day.

#9) A picture that makes your heart happy

Dead family pose....AhaAHahahaHAHaha LOVING THIS!

#10) A picture that makes your heart sad

She's in the MTC now... it's been 2 days and I already miss her.

#11) A picture of when everything was changing

Beginning a new phase of life... this was right before college started.

#12) A picture of how you'd like the world to see you

A good astronomer, and one who loves all that she does. Happy.

#13) A picture of someone you love

The 4 of us. 9 years and counting!

#14) A picture of when you were a different person then you are now

Freshman year of college... good times, but a lot has happened since...

#15) A picture of when you were nothing but happy

Dresses! And brothers in dresses!!! What could be better??!?!?

#16) A picture of when you were anything but happy

Stewart and I fighting. That's always no bueno!

#17) A picture of time in your life that's over, and you're glad it is

Gag. Working with Emily in the office of death.

#18) A picture of a time in your life that's over, and you wish it wasn't

Being an RA changed me more than people think. What I wish wasn't over is being with my girls 24/7. They were all an absolute joy.

#19) A picture of you showing off a new haircut

Shana does wonderful things to my unruly hair. Loving this!

#20) A picture of you being absolutely ridiculous

Shana and I being absolutely ridiculous at Moab. This is the Lion King pose.

#21) The most recent picture of you

4th of July in Oakley, Ut... small town parades are the BEST!

#22) A picture of you being truly yourself

Teaching other people about astronomy. How could this not be me?

#23) A picture of you eating something

Thanksgiving at ST2. Calista didn't want me to eat that crust...

#24) A picture of you making a goofy face at the camera

Girls Camp 2006. Being the president had its perks.... like walkie talkies, and priceless pictures.

#25) A picture of you in one of your favorite outfits

The Belle dress. Timeless.

#26) The youngest picture of you in digital form

I have hair here.... so I must be at least 2.

#27) A picture of you on your birthday/favorite holiday

Shannon's wedding/my 20th. She gave me a whole tier of the cake as a present! :)

#28) A picture of you outside

Outside my Apts. Who names apts this in PROVO?!?!?!

#29) A picture you couldn't leave out

Last summer, Seattle Washington. Good times, good friends.

#30) A picture of just you

Memorial Day hike on Mt. Aire

Airports

I am sitting in PDX airport right now. I think that PDX is the prettiest and friendliest airport. I'll give Oregon that. I like that it's green, HUGE windows, carpeted, and not confusing.

SLC gets a C-.... I can't stand that airport.

Atlanta gets an A for entertainment, but a D for being confusing, underlit, and intimidating. But the people are friendly.

Seattle gets a B-. (Sorry Seattle friends!)

Thinking about ariports makes me wonder what I'll think of other airports I've not been to, but will soon experience. Frankfurt. Paris. London. Madrid.

5 weeks 1 day 20 hours.

Have you ever wondered why strangers don't reach out and talk to each other? I see a lot of people flying alone, sitting awkwardly next to each other, and not talking. In my experience most people I meet in the airport or on planes are fascinating. One time I even met a guy who told me about an internship at his buisness, which I applied for. I wonder if people have lost the art of conversation. If we only know how to talk to people we've known for a while. Has the whole "don't talk to strangers" mantra we learned as children become "don't talk to people. period."?

HA. What a paradox. We have the most capacity to communicate (EVER) and we don't actually talk.

I'm tired of looking at my computer screen. I think I'll talk to someone now.

Take 2

Ok, the last post was uber depressing. It happens. Grad School still weighs on my mind, but life moves on, and I am glad it does. I spoke once with a friend of mine about how he stayed so positive. This friend of mine went through trial after trial after trial.... I asked him, "how do you stay so upbeat?" To which he replied, "Well, you're sad for a while, but don't stay down for long." I heard that for the first time 2 years ago, and I'll never forget it. Don't stay down for long.
Anyway, life is GREAT! This past week I have had tons of adventures. I'll have to post 4th of July stuff later (sorry, I don't have my pictures on my computer yet!) but I have to talk about West Mountain!
West Mountain Observatory (WMO) is the observatory operated by BYU astronomy dept. It's like a little piece of heaven. I went there at the beginning of last week, and we got awesome data. It's so different to actually be in a place specifically set aside for astronomy research, as opposed to working with a telescope in the same building as all my classes. For the first time in a looooooong time I felt like a real astronomer again. I loved every second of it, even though I came back with more than 20 mosquito bites.

A little piece of heaven - WMO. Sunrise over Happy Valley. This pic doesn't do it justice.

The main dome, open, with la luna in the upper corner.

The 12in telescope. (Takes AMAZING data for such a little scope.)
Sunset over Utah Lake. Stunning.

These things will change

I use lots of song titles for my blog titles. I have never been one to try and make up something clever on my own when someone else already did a fantastic job of it. I just steal it like a pirate.

The inspiration for this post came about because yesterday was a very girly day. I just broke down. I usually don't lose it (or, as Shana says, I don't talk about my feelings), but yesterday I guess my eyes decided to make sure that the tear ducts were functioning properly. All. freaking. day. Usually, I don't mind shedding a few tears in front of people, but yesterday I was a faucet.

It started with the death of a dream. I have been working towards grad school for years. Many of the things I have done, I did for the sole purpose to help me get into graduate school. Internships, research groups, classes, jobs, and networking... all for gaining a higher degree. But I cannot pass the Physics GRE. Well, I just haven't done it yet, and I do not know if I can.

Yesterday I came to the realization that maybe I'm not supposed to go to graduate school. Maybe school stops for me next April. Maybe I should get another bachelor's degree. Maybe I should keep trying to pass the PhysGRE. Maybe I should go to cooking school. Maybe I should join the circus.

Ultimately, I decided to not think about it right now. My decision is to not make a decision. Emotionally, I'm too close to the problem to figure out a good solution. Spiritually, I actually am learning a lot about trust and faith. Especially trust. And I really really like that. Surprisingly.

Anyway, yesterday all of this came to a head. I have been avoiding dealing with it for so long, that it all finally came out in this big, horrible, mess. I felt like the only thing holding me together was a prayer and sheer force of will.

So, yesterday was a girly day. I needed a guy to hug me and tell me everything would be ok. Even if it isn't true, I needed it very much. But I always hate hate hate asking someone to do that. And it can't be a girl to hug me, because I feel like I make girls feel sad when I am sad, and I don't like that. Guys seem to not be affected, and I really like that.

After a long day, a good friend came, and he helped me. And I was cured. And I didn't even have to ask, because Someone Else already knew, and He likes to take care of me.

I think that somehow everything will be ok. I know there are more days ahead of me where I will need to grieve for the death of this, my most favorite dream ever.... But it will be ok.

"Oh, the power to be strong,

And the wisdom to be wise,

All these things will come to you in time."

Summer Solstice!

Yesterday marked the annual summer solstice. It also happened to land on Father's Day, and I was kind of torn about the fact that I was more excited about the solstice. It happens, I'm a nerd.

Anyway, in order to celebrate I went on a meteorite hunt on saturday with the astronomy and geology clubs. Oh. My. What. A. BLAST!

We went to the middle of nowhere - about an hour south of Delta - to some dry lakebeds called the playa. Meteorites are easier to find there because the lake beds are flat and white, and meteorites tend to be round and black - a very nice stark contrast for our eager little eyes.

In the lakebeds we found other interesting things - scorpion skeletons, beetles, grasshoppers, meteor-wrongs (little rocks like chirt, limestone and even obsidian), and other random things.

Chirt really got me mixed up a lot. I kept thinking that I had found a meteorite, only to discover that it was a boring piece of chirt.

Life is like that sometimes, I guess. All that glitters is not gold, and all that is black and round is not a meteorite.

We searched for a good while, and actually found 2 very good candidates. They passed all the tests that we could do on the spot, and now the teachers are going to send them away to make sure that they are actual meteorites. There are only 13 reported meteorites found in Utah... and we may have found 2 more! SO. EXCITING!

P.S. 2 months, 1 day, 20 hours.

"you quench my heart, you quench my mind."

I don't know why I chose that particular title for my post. It is a total non-sequiter. I just like it a lot.
Anyway, today is the last day of school for me, for the year 2009. It's even more exciting than it sounds, trust me.
2 months, 8 days, 17 hours.