Brought to you by Congress Spending

This post comes inspired by Kylie.

Things I cannot get over:

1. The Economy/The Electoral College/ Stock Market/ Politics.
At best I sort-of half understand all these. I have tried so hard. Really, really hard. But I don't get it. Any of them. Every side presents their case with at least some truth, but without me knowing EVERYTHING it's hard to find who is telling the most truth and therefore pick a side. Can't I just go look through a telescope for a while? No, because congress ran out of money. It's one big circuitous ANNOYING fight in my head.

2. Sports love
To illustrate the extent of my lack of understanding, I cannot even write a paragraph about how much I don't understand. Pretty extensive, huh?

3. People who get uncomfortably close.
To be fair, I have done this for comedic effect, but I know some people who just get all up in your face. And that "I'm terribly near-sighted" excuse just won't work here. If I can freaking feel you breath, you are too close.

4. How trees grow.
Yup, I didn't pay attention in 2nd grade. I could probably solve this with a quick trip to Wikipedia, but I like that trees are still mysterious to me. That way I can keep pretending faeries live in them and build up the tree to accomodate their ever increasing population.

5. Why melted cheese and fried chicken skin are so dang good.
Seriously, it could probably solve US-Middle East relations, but no one ever thinks to bring along some KFC do they? That's really why they get mad around the discussion table. They're hungry but they have to eat fancy food, carefully selected to impress the visitor, not solve problems. Come on, world leaders, think!


You didn't know that the first thanksgiving was actually a successful peace treaty due to my 11 secret herbs and spices.